Critical Investigation Learner Response...

Level 2+

WWW: There are a lot of positives here; huge amount of research and plenty of good quotes. However...

EBI: You don't answer you own question! The majority of the essay is on the representation of women rather than men. I wonder if changing your title to gender in R&B would be the best way to proceed. Topic sentences need work; you need to ensure the paragraph is focused on the question and doesn't drift off. Don't start a paragraph with a quote. 

Original Topic Question: Blurred Lines: How are males represented in R&B music?

Changed Topic Question: Blurred Lines: How are gender roles represented in R&B music?

Aim for second draft: Level 3+ 

Firstly I would change my topic question as majority of the essay is not focused on my topic which is the representation of men in R&B however as I have focused more on the opposite gender females, I am considering of changing the question as 'Blurred Lines - How are genders in R&B music represented'. Secondly I need to improve my English skills and rewrite topic sentences to make the essay sound more professional and well written for a higher grade, this also includes completing each paragraph without drifting off the topic. Furthermore I have researched a huge amount of quotes and have placed them in the wrong paragraphs such as starting a paragraph of with a quote, this all needs to be changed or embedded in my own words. I have not explained my historical paragraph very well therefore needs to be re-written and structured properly using the P.E.E method which will help me get my point across more clearly. Lastly as I have focused on the representation of females mostly, I need to re think the structure of my essay and add in examples using my primary and secondary text. I also need to include theorists as I have not mentioned many throughout the essay.

BFI Library Wish List:

- Key theorists that relate to gender representation.

- More evidence of male representation in R&B music as I'll be comparing both gender roles.

- S.H.E.P aspects in R&B music. 

14^th February – Half Term

Week Beginning: 27^th January

Tuesday 28^th January: Complete final planning for storyboard and shot list.

Thursday 30^th January:  Organise dates for shooting, decided which scenes to shoot, finalise everything.

Friday 31^st January:  Book camera to film.

Saturday 1^st January:  Begin filming the first scenes. (Outdoor)

Week Beginning: 3^rd February

Monday 3^rd February: Ask music department if we can film in the drama studio and to check if a room would be free to film.

Tuesday 4^th February: Film office scene.

Thursday 6^th February: Carry on filming the office scene during media lesson. If necessarily, film after school.

Friday 7^th February:  Filming the first Studio Scene after school.

Saturday 8^th February:  Split screen scene (Anita’s House) and shoot last scene of the music video (if we have time)

Tuesday 11th February:  Film Studio scene.

Thursday 13^th February: look through the entire scene we have filmed and to decide whether we have to film some shots again.  

MEST4 - Coursework Blogpost...

Linked Production Ideas...
Group: Navneet & Gagan.N
Production: Music Video
Artist and Song: Katy Perry - Roar
Main Characters: Myself & Desman

Our production is going to focus on a female (Me) who'd not happy in her relationship as her partner (Desman) does not treat her well, he is represented as a typical male stereotype at the start however subverts into a weak character and depends on the female at the end. The female character portrays herself as a dominant independent women as she rejects her partner and wants to pursue her dreams. We are also subverting the females stereotype to a muscular role in the production. This idea relates to our Critical Investigations as Navneet, Gagan and I are all focusing on representation, furthermore me and Gagan are focusing on music videos and Navneet is focusing on Film therefore we have decided to create a music video with a narrative. Moreover Gagan and Navneet focus on the representation of females and I focus on the representation of men therefore we have used a couple in the production to link together. 

Our target audience will be aimed at the Female audience at the age of 16-28 which allows them to identify the character, this relates to the Users and Gratifications theory of personal identity and relationships, as the audience would be able to relate to the storyline and being influenced as a independent women.